Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Dear Cbs.

Click Here first: Dear Cbs, I would like to know who in your casting department thought that this would be some funny joke that everyone would laugh about over there watercoolers after this show aired. I mean one would think that somewhere during the casting process, a light bulb would go off in someone's head that this would be a bad idea. I mean you do hire people with college degrees right? I'm glad that this family got eliminated first because I couldn't bare to say "Damn the Blacks are last again" or "The blacks are winning yay the blacks are winning!". I absolutely love this show but you guys made a huge error in doing this(along with having a family edition). Hopefully you will learn from your mistakes and not do this again. Sincerely yours.

Battle of the Sexes.

During a recent team meeting here at work we had a "team builder" type of game. We played Battle of the Sexes, where the guys would ask the girls guy related questions and vice versa. Let's just say having me on the guys team was a total advantage. Let's look at the following questions that were asked: 1. Who is the actress that plays Erica Kane on All My Children? Me-Susan Lucci 2. Name the four characters on Sex and The City. Me-Charlotte, Miranda, Samantha, and Carrie 3. Who founded the 'O' Magazine? Me-Oprah 4. What drink is made with the following ingredients: Triple Sec, Cranberry, and Vodka? Me-Cosmopolitan 5. Name 3 of the Spice Girls. Me-Their real names or Spice names? 6. Who founded Lilith Fair? Me-Sarah Mclaughlin Needless to say the guys won, mostly because of me. The ladies thought it was unfair that I was on the guy's team, the guys didn't care because we won. And I realized that I am really really really really gay.


Sorry I haven't updated in awhile but you know how it is sometimes. So here are some recent happenings: -I went to ACL on Sunday with RT, Jenny, Bob and others. It was hot(108), I got covered in dust. I snapped on some lady and Coldplay rocked! -I'm moving to a new apt this weekend with Jessica. -I'm going to see the free Sheryl Crow concert at Zilker Park -I'm still single. That is all carry on...

Saturday, September 17, 2005

She's number one to me.

Well the season of Big Brother is officially over for me. The finale is on Tuesday but I personally don't care who wins or loses. The best Big Brother player to ever to play the game was evicted last night. So I'm gonna drink one for our little Janey. Image hosted by

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

The Busalogues, volume 1.

RT likes it when I entertain him with my stories of my various misadventures on the bus, so I thought this one was funny enough to share with you ladies and gentlemen. Enjoy! I saw 'Crash' this past weekend with Juan and his scoobies. If you haven't seen it yet you should, it kind of goes with the story. Lately the buses have been unusually packed, mostly due to the fact that gas is 800 dollars a gallon now. Well today I got on the bus a was standing up when this lady looks at me and ask if I want to sit down. I immediately notice the red bracelet she has on her left hand. Now those of you that don't know, alot of the Evacuees from Louisiana have this bracelet that allows them to get in and out of the convention center. I know this because of the people I told you about last week. Well I'm sitting there and I couldn't help but start a conversation with this woman. I ask her, "Are you from Louisiana?", she looks at me with disgust probably assuming that I asked her this because of her color-which was not the case. She responded with a no, and I respond with "I'm sorry it was the bracelet". She laughs and states "Oh yea I've been meaning to take that off, I was helping this family out from there." My interest grows, and I respond "Yea, I know it's really sad." "Your telling me" she says, "I just moved her from New Orleans about two months ago and now this." "I know. Is the family okay?", I ask. "Yea," she says "It was a grandmother and her 3 grandkids all under 5. They were able to find a place for them to live" "Well that's good", I say and the conversation pretty much ends. The bus stops and this guy gets on. He's kind of heavy set, Asian and obviously a student. My new friend leans over and tells me "Yea know, not to talk about anyone but I have never seen a fat asian before". I laugh and respond, "You've never seen a sumo wrestler?" She hits my arm and starts laughing "You've got a point". So the moral of the story is this. Regardless of race, gender, class status we are all the same. Crash showed me that in a very harsh manner.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Well Well Well

He wrote this. And I can't say that I agree more. But on a much lighter note, I'm glad we have some evacuees(not Refugees anymore that was PC enough*thank you RT) here in Austin. I'm hoping that they can contribute to the culture and music that we Austinites hold so dearly. Welcome Louisianians, and don't worry we won't turn our backs on you like George W. did. Now go explore the city!!! Cajun has met Cowboy and I can't wait to see the results!!

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

The one about labor day weekend.

Editor’s Note: This blog is going to be a little bit different from what I normally post; instead of creating an individual post for each story I’m going to combine them all into one. Each part is different so read them all or just one, hopefully you’ll laugh and cry and maybe pee yourself a little. “The great wall of Duval” Me: Hey are those Pina Coladas ready yet? Jaime: Yes, but you’re getting the small glasses, no fancy ones. Me: Why do I have to be all white trash? Jaime: Well honey I serve them like I see em. Me: Bitch. This was this past Friday at Ric and Jaime’s fort also known as, ‘The great wall of Duval”. This house is freaking sweet. It’s the only house on Duval constructed like a fort, so you can sit outside and do whatever (wink, wink Jaime) without anyone seeing what your doing. The huge metal sliding doors make the place look every more like a compound. The house is nice to except for the fact that the foundation is shifting the floor around (which isn’t a good thing after you’ve been drinking). Unfortunately, I had lost my wit mojo on Friday and Jaime, RT and SD came at me with full force. I got insult after insult after insult. By the time RT and SD left I felt like a small child beaten to a pulp by some friends. But it’s ok I will have a full artillery for them the next time I seem them. “Some people just don’t get it.” So after a somber and relaxing with my siblings on Saturday I literally got out of my younger brother’s car and got into Luis’ for a night out on the town. I know my brothers were scratching their heads at what had just occurred because lord knows I was. Adrain, Will and Tricia (Luis’ best friend) were also in the car and I figured that this was going to be a full filled night with the guys. Wrong. While we were waiting in line (the front of the line mind you) at Fabric when out of now where Sal pops up. I give him a hug and a hi with hopes that he would continue on his way. Did he continue on his way? Nope, he decided to leech himself onto me and my friends. I tried everything possible to get him to leave me alone but nothing was working. I even enlisted the help of Luis and William but that didn’t work either. Luckily, Sal the idiot gave me an opportunity I couldn’t pass by. I’m at the bar ordering a drink for Tricia and myself when he taps me on my shoulder and ask, “Can you buy me a Lonestar”? First of all the idiot wanted a Lonestar, a ####### Lonestar. How unattractive is that? And Second of all he had the nerve to ask me to buy him a drink. I mean maybe because I didn’t have a sign on my forehead that said “Go away” he didn’t get the point. So the bartender takes my order, “A vodka sour and a Bud Light” I say. He hands me my drinks and I had Tricia hers and continue on my way leaving Sal looking like the fool that he is. That ladies and gentlemen is how you get rid of someone in two easy steps. Ten minutes later I saw him mooching a drink off of someone else. Some people and their nerve I swear. I really wanted to play RT’s game of “Buy me a drink of I’ll stab you in the eye” but Luis stopped me just in time. “This is a category 5” William, Jenny, Bob and myself had done some serious bar hopping on Sunday and on Monday my legs were hurting from all the constant walking(and the fact that I may have fallen down at some point, Ya never know) Well I had ordered a Hurricane at Oilcan Harry’s. Now those of you don’t know what a Hurricane is, it’s a drink with 4 different liquors all rum, I believe. Ironically, the drink originated in New Orleans. Please forgive me for the following: Me: Bob, can you take the rest of this drink it’s way to ####### strong. Bob: (obviously drunk) Yes, (takes a huge swig of the drink and begins to cough) Guys I think this is a category 5 Was the joke wrong? Yes. Was it funny? Yes. Should I written about it? Probably no but oh well. Later that night we all headed over to Rox’s where I met three of her friends from back home. Well Aileen, Carter and Carl were all actually from New Orleans and they were staying with Rox because of all the damage that has happened. It’s one thing to hear about stories from the various news sources, it’s even harder hearing personally accounts of what has happened. What’s even harder is seeing a human being in person going through this drama. I felt bad for them, I wanted to hand over my wallet and be like “just take it” but of course I didn’t. At some point Carl started this freestyle wrap(note this is what I was able to scribble down). The water washed away my home but it can’t take away my soul As I was writing this down, Carl goes “what dat u got der?” Me: Oh I write, do you mind? Carl: Nah dat’s cool. They actually turned out to be really nice guys and I couldn’t help but pick a little of the accent up. This was a good weekend, work starts tomorrow and I’m not really looking forward to it.

Friday, September 02, 2005

A sigh of relief.

I don't normally watch the news, the news enstills fear and if I have to live in a state of fear well life wouldn't be worth living. With that said, I couldn't help but watch the news and read various articles that have been published about the havoc that Hurricane Katrina has caused. The chaos that is going on New Orleans is seriously crazy but I would like to pose the following questions: 1) Is it smart of the media to show how the oil damage that has occured is affecting our society? I mean we live in a world post 9/11 and there on CNN are ariel/satalite shots of where the oil is. I mean that's like shouting at the terrorist "Hey hit us here, where it hurts the most". 2) Isn't it kind of...shall I say it, Biblical that a city known for it's sin is being washed away by a natural disaster? Normally I wouldn't post such harsh views on a subject but I've heard alot of personal accounts of what exactly is going on over there(mostly because of my job) and can't help but become angry and sad. My heart goes out to all of those people suffering and I hope that some sort of normality will return to their lives soon. If you can please donate something, if anything. They need it more than we do right now. RedCross.Org That is all, we will now return to your normally scheduled blogging.